Double-Edged Sword

Today is my youngest son's twenty-fifth birthday. While I am delighted that he has grown into a productive member of society, I can't deny that sometimes I miss the days when my kids really needed me. My middle son was off work today (because he worked Saturday), so he and I met the youngest one for lunch. My kids' birthdays are always days of mixed emotions, and it seems to be more the case as they get older. I don't mean, of course, that I don't want them to get older! But I suppose it's natural to think about how tiny they were and how much they relied on me, and how as they got older and bigger they relied on my less. I know that's how it's supposed to work. As I have said before, I'm glad my sons want to spend time with me and that I want to spend time with them. I've known lots of people who didn't want to spend time with their parents, and I've also known a few parents who want nothing to do with their children. That's very sad.

Lately I've seen a meme going around on Facebook that says something about how doing a good job as a parent essentially pushes your children away from you. I guess that's true to an extent, although I don't look at it exactly that way. Maybe I've seen too many forty-year-olds still living at home with their parents, which probably isn't healthy for any of them. But back to my son's birthday . . . my middle son and I enjoyed an hour-and-a-half trip to Daytona, which was nice because we don't spend a lot of time together, just the two of us. (And of course we did enjoy the same trip in reverse after lunch.) I had baked a three-layer butter cake and frosted and decorated it. We got to the restaurant early, so I took the cake in and asked if they could keep it chilled for me. The staff was so nice. This was just a place we had found randomly -- it's called Nicola's Pizza and Subs -- that was approximately halfway between Winter Park and Jacksonville, but it turned out to be wonderful. We had a simple but delicious meal, after which I was able to surprise my son with the cake. I didn't have candles, so I had done twenty-five frosting stars on the top. He loved it -- the surprise, the cake, and the fact that I took the time to make it. Our server was so friendly and helpful I offered her a piece and she eagerly accepted.

Now I am back home, three pets surrounding me. (The old dog came home with me because my youngest son is moving this week.) The rain is beating down and I'm trying not to think about having a houseful of kids and noise. I'm sure in the moment, I didn't always appreciate it. But now, on occasion, I sure do miss it.