When my doctor prescribed a medication that he said would help with "menopausal mood swings", I didn't give him nearly enough credit. In fact, as I've probably mentioned before, I glared at him, proving his point at least a little. Here's what I don't get though: I had one ovary removed in 2003 and the other in 2010, and while I didn't start noticing symptoms of menopause until nearly two years afterwards, shouldn't it be over by now? How can I still be menopausal six years after my body stopped producing hormones? I do take HRT. I wonder if I'm just messing myself up more with that, kind of prolonging the inevitable. Will I be like this the rest of my life? I enjoy the rollercoaster, the ups and downs (which is a good thing because if I didn't, I'd probably have hanged myself by now, and I'm only half-joking), but over the past few years, sometimes the highs are too high and the lows too low. Even on the same day! I can go from being "up" to the point of nearly giddy to feeling completely useless and self-loathing in a matter of hours, or minutes, or seconds. It's crazy.
Truly I am not complaining, just trying to figure it out. I don't feel like it's a huge problem because I recognize, even at my lowest point, that I will bounce back. And, trite as it sounds, the lows make the highs that much sweeter. Some of this is probably within my control; exercising more and getting back to healthy eating (I've kind of gone off the rails this summer) would likely help. Certainly, they couldn't hurt. In addition to making those changes, I'll just keep riding out the bad days and savoring the good ones. Like the song says, "That's life."
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