The Look of Love

I've noticed that since I started on my month-long blog title/song title challenge, my posts have been much longer than usual. Tonight that won't be the case. Over the past few weeks, I've given a bit of background on the song whose title I'm using, either about the song itself or its significance to me. I have no attachment to the song of tonight's title; it just fit in with something my son told me a little while ago. I kind of know the song, but I don't know who performs it.

Anyway, in the midst of one of our more lengthy phone conversations, my son paused -- it's not unusual; he considers what he says carefully -- before saying, "I might not have mentioned I've got a little bit of a situation going on over here." Before he said anything else, I knew it was about a girl. (I'm not sure if you caught it, but I just referenced two other songs in those first few sentences.) So he said, "This girl from school seems somewhat smitten with me." He didn't say this in a boastful way. He simply said it. He, on the other hand, is ambivalent. Or perhaps even apathetic. He said he and his friend made a pro and con chart about whether he should begin dating this girl, but that eventually it became more about making an awesome chart with various visual aids than about the girl. Ultimately, they and the other friend who joined them part-way through decided the cons outweighed the pros.

This young woman is the roommate of his friend's girlfriend. My son said she has always been nice to him, but he's heard some stories from the roommates about times she hasn't been so nice. (I didn't ask questions. I've found it's better to let these stories evolve uninterrupted. Have you ever noticed that the less you ask the more you learn, at least when it comes to kids? I never told my mom anything, even as an adult, because she constantly interrogated me.) My son said that probably the best thing this young woman has going for her is that she is delighted with him. I replied that if he wasn't equally delighted, he should decline her increasing requests for his company. "Never settle," I told him. "You've got too much going for you to settle. In fact, you're quite awesome." He mumbled thanks in a tone that implied, "Of course you would say that! You're my mom!" We talked about it a lot, and I think his final answer was that this woman in particular is not someone he wants to spend time with. I'm glad. He has a month and a half of college left; after that, he can indulge all the loving gestures that come his way. Until then, it's best to focus his "look of love" on his studies. I know -- spoken like a mom!