Butting In

Last night I was going to write about my adventure after the show. The gig was great, by the way; I'm not sure whether I said that before. I thought in the moment and the hours following that I had been protective. Now I think that, while I may indeed have made someone feel safer and put a harasser in his place, it really wasn't any of my business. For some reason, two young women came over to me and the mother of one of the other band members and told us that a man had been bothering them as they tried to enjoy the live music outdoors at The Landing. They were probably thirty-or-so years old, and I know that at the same age I wouldn't have hesitated to confront someone who was messing with me. But I stepped in for two reasons: They were tourists (here for a conference) and I didn't want that experience to be their lasting impression of Jacksonville, and I don't like bullies.

So I went over to the guy and told him to leave them alone. He kept trying to explain himself. I said, "You're making them uncomfortable; stay away from them." Everytime he started to say something I said, "The only thing I want to hear from you is, 'I understand'. Do you understand?" After three or four rounds of that, he finally said, "I understand." So I went back over to where the women were standing and told them he wouldn't be a problem anymore. Oh, and on the way I stopped and had a chat with the cop standing nearby, just in case the harasser really didn't understand. I said to one of the women, "Did you see the teardrop under his eye?" To which she replied, "Yeah. I didn't ask him who he killed."

Is it crazy that I do this? It isn't the first time. I have this crazy overly-maternal need to help people feel safe. The other band mom and her husband insisted on walking me to my car because it was dark out and sometimes The Landing area is a little sketchy. I wanted to laugh -- it was kind of a turn of the tables, someone watching out for me -- but I accepted the offer in the spirit in which it was given. They are very nice people and sincerely had my interests at heart. And I suppose that, regarding my butting in adventure, they thought I was either very bold or very stupid. I'm truly not sure which -- or even how I would view if I'd been watching someone else.